40 by 40 - Good Deed 38

Today's good deed is one I've been planning but just couldn't bring myself to actually do because of the memories that would come rushing up.

Today I gave to the American Lung Association in memory of my sister Elena.

My baby sister.

The one that should be here today to be an aunt to my girls.

The beautiful, vivacious girl who should be enjoying her life - maybe with a husband and kids of her own.

But it wasn't meant to be. She left us way too soon and far too suddenly.

I miss her every day. Sometimes it's in expected ways - like glancing at her picture hanging in my stairwell. Other days it's something totally random - like a doctor's appointment. Monday when we were at Madeline's well-child exam, they asked her if she knew her full name. And in her cute, squeaky voice she said "Madeline Elena." I smiled and my heart kind of sank at the same time.

I gave to the American Lung Association because if Elena had pulled through, she would have most likely needed a lung transplant because her lungs were over 90% infected.

It was a hard deed to do but one I'm glad I did. And my donation will be matched by my work's matching donation program, helping it go a little farther in finding ways to give us all breath.